Lonely heart club

Feelings are just like the weather..

I recently came across a quote:

psychology says the person who tries to keep everyone happy often ends up feeling the loneliest.

I strongly agree with this statement. There are days, more often than not I feel this in my bones. My day job is a full medical doctor, so it goes without saying I take care of people health. I come home and I take care of my daughter.

I work really hard not to be a burden to others, but be available should anyone need me. I want the people in my life to be happy, even though I realize it’s an incredibly tall and unrealistic order.

Along the way, I’ve become so hyper focused on work and my daughter. I spend a lot of my downtime alone. I have a person in my life, but our schedules make it hard to see each other. Until at one time, he betrayed me.

My closest friends ….schedules sometimes don’t line up. While I appreciate my quiet moments- too many can really start to wreak havoc on me. I need people. I need my people. I have a hard time admitting that.

I love my life and appreciate everything I have, but there are times where it’s glaringly obvious I need some adult time. I am a strong, independent person but even us caregivers need someone to take care of us. Even if it’s to meet up for coffee for a half hour. Even if it’s to text. To call. To send a hilarious card in the mail.

Totin Jamain
I give myself the luxury of saying what I want.